Wet mattress

Yesterday evening I was cold. Cold to the extent that I made myself a hot water bottle before I went to bed so that I didn't freeze when I got into bed. Great idea. Well, it would have been if the hot water bottle hadn't split down the seam, leaking it's entire contents into my bed sheets and right through the mattress.

Just as I thought I could curl up in a nice warm bed I discovered that I had a soaking wet, and quickly cooling bed. I didn't know what to do. I stripped the bed sheets off, and mopped up as much of the water as I could. Then I turned the mattress over (no mean feat in a room that is barely bigger than the bed) and placed a folded towel over the damp patch (yes, the water had gone right through the whole mattress). I then put new sheets on the bed. I expected not to sleep very well due to the folded towel under my body. However, I discovered something - the underside of my mattress is much more comfortable to sleep on than the top. Either that, or I've had it upside down for the past two years!

Anyway, I'm going away for a few days tomorrow, so I'll stand the mattress up in an attempt to dry it out. My neice suggested that I tumble dry it. I'd like to see a dryer big enough!

Impressing myself

I have to say, I am impressed with myself. Not only have I succeeded in posting photos onto the blog, but I've also updated the blog several days in a row! Unbelievable.

Proposal photos!

This is the team that Simon recruited to dig the proposal! Note the gardan spades brought along too. A huge effort!

The writing in the sand.

The proposal as it looked from the cliff top. (It actually looked a bit larger, but the photo is deceptive).

Update

On Sunday I told you about a cardiac arrest that I went to.

Today I was back in the hospital that we took him to, and I was able to enquire how he was. He's well. The cause of the cardiac arest was a large heart attack. He'd had surgery and is likely to have some more before he's sent home. Other than some slight confusion (which will probably improve with time), he is perfectly well. He has full use of all his body and brain, with no deficits. It really is incredible. I feel very lucky to have had a part (all be it small) in his survival. This is the sort of job that really gives you satisfaction as you see the results of your efforts.

Frustration

Today, two of my patients were mental health patients.

These are the worst sort of patient. For two reasons. The first reason is that I get SO frustrated at how helpless I am to do anything for them. I am not a psyciatrist. I do not have any training in counselling. I do not know how to deal with a suicidal person. There is no easy option, no pill I can offer them, no cure and no answers that I can give them. There is nothing I can do except take them to hospital, where I am aware that they will often be ignored, belittled and shunned, the attention going to medical or surgical patients, in whom a treatment action usually results in visible improvements. The only other option is to get a GP to visit them at home. This option is not without problems. The GP will not give a time when he/she will visit, meaning that the patient may need to be left alone for a short (or very long) period of time, which is often not appropriate. The GP has very limited time to spend with the patient. in a short amount of time it is very difficult to establish the exact problem and find solutions. Especially when there are no easy solutions. Most of the patients that I see who have mental health problems hate doctors and hospitals. There are no emergency mental health crisis teams that are accessible to us, and the one that I tracked down once would not come out and visit the patient at the weekend (when they were most needed).

So, a very frustrating type of job.

The second problem with these patients is that I find it extremely difficult not to cry when they talk to me and tell me what the problem is. People are rarely suicidal without good reason. When they tell me how they feel and wy they feel that way, it upsets me. I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing. I don't know if I'm meant to be stoical and detached, or if it's ok to feel some of their pain and so hopefully be compassionate toward them.

The good thing about such patients is that however down I may be feeling about things in my own life, I come away feeling blessed, reminded that my problems are small in comparison to others, that I have friends and family who love and care about me and a God who knows me and loves me.

But still, when I leave them I feel sad and intensly frustrated about the lack of treatment, hope or options for them.

Blog

This morning I was reminded that I have a blog.

Yet again, it's been nearly a month since I updated it.

This month I've been mainly looking for a wedding dress. I found it yesterday. Not bought it yet because I fully intend to ring round all the stockists doing some haggling first, to ensure I've got it for the best possible price. I don't normally haggle, but when the item you're buying is £400 I think it can't do any harm. I've already been offered it for £360. I'll try and get that lower if I can. I have, however, bought the bridesmaid dresses. We've also done the church and pastor/preacher booking and sorted a reception venue (Simon's back garden).

In other news, I'm really enjoying these day shifts, there's a likelihood that I'll be able to extend the temporary position to the beginning of January (an extra month) and a slight possibility that I'll be able to extend it further to the beginning of April.

On Friday, I had a great job (I didn't actually have to do a great deal). It was a cardiac arrest. Usually, the chances of surviving a cardiac arrest are minimal. Very minimal. This man (only 54 years old) collapsed at work. Fortunately for him, he collapsed outside the occupational health office, and he received immediate first aid (resuscitation). Within 5 minutes (as the place of work was within Bristol) there was a rapid response vehicle on scene, who attached a defibrillator, and proceeded to shock the patient. The one shock reverted the patient's heart to a normal rhythm, which also triggered the patient to start breathing again. Something I'd never seen before. He was still unconscious, but needed no further intervention as we rushed him into hospital. I don't know how he is now, I'll try and find out tomorrow. It depends what caused the collapse. It may have been a massive stroke or heart attack. Thankfully, the effective resuscitation, given immediately after his collapse, means that the supply of oxygen to his brain was almost un-inturrupted. Meaning that if he does recover, he has a chance of a full recovery.

If he had collapsed anywhere else, I suspect his survival chances would be extremelly reduced. I'll update you if I find out any more about him.

Day shifts

Today I started on a days only rota. This is just for 3 months as I have managed to get someone to arrange a temporary swap with me. It's wonderful. No night shifts. Every evening off. Every other weekend off. An extra hour in bed in the morning.

I can make arrangements for my evenings. I can see Simon. I can go to church regularly. I can visit friends.

WOOOOOOOHOOOOOO!

What's the catch? There is none. Pay is slightly reduced. i.e. I earn about £100 less a month. A sacrifice I am more than willing to pay for a social life. Otherwise, there is no difference. The only dissapointment is that it is only for 3 months so that in December I have to go back to days and night shifts.

ENGAGED!

Most (if not all) all you have probably heard by now that I got engaged just over a week ago.

It was an extremely romantic proposal and I'm surprised I didn't cry. In fact, if I'd believed it really was for me I'm sure I would have cried a bit. Instead I laughed in disbelief.

It happened like this. I went camping last weekend with Simon (my fiancee), my best friend Caroline, and her boyfriend. We went to Swanage together and were having a fabulous weekend. I felt really relaxed and it was lovely to spend some time with the people I love. The things we did included watching fireworks on the beach, open air cinema under the stars, eating out, nice walks, snorkelling and swimming. On the sunday afternoon we were wandering along from Lulworth Cove to Durdle Door. As we arrived at the top of the cliff by Durdle Door I wandered to the edge to look at the view. After aproximately a minute of staring out to sea and studying the horizon and surrounding headlands I glanced down at the beach. There, in letters about 2 metres high was the message HANNAH MARRY ME?

Having been with Simon for the entire weekend, I was sure that the message could not be for me so jokingly commented "Is that for me?!". With this he got down on his knee and produced a ring from his pocket, asking me if I would marry him. Strangely, although over the moon, all I felt able to consider was how the message got there! It eventually sank in that the message was for me. I said yes.

It turned out that Simon had arranged for 8 of his friends from work and uni to come down and dig the message into the beach. It took all 8 of them and hour and a half, using 3 spades! Simon had even taken a day off work earlier in the week to go down to Dorset and study the prospective beaches. He'd been meticulously planning it for about 3 months. Meanwhile I'd been grumbling to him that he never did anything romantic, and that he should surprise me occasionally!

The wedding is to be on the 7th of July next year. This is my ploy to enable Simon to easily remember our anniversary (07/07/07). It also happens to be the one date that I can get a guaranteed fortnight of annual leave after for a honeymoon.

Now we just have to do all the planning, related shopping, deciding who to invite etc. etc. It seems such a long time away, but I'm sure it'll come round quick enough.

Work...

As I mentioned, work has been very busy.

A fortnight ago I had the nastiest job that I've been to yet. It involved an 18 year old girl who had not known she was pregnant and had got up to go to the toilet in the night and given birth to a baby. The baby was full term. She had (presumably in shock) taken the baby back to bed with her. We don't know if the baby was alive at this point but when her mother got up later, she found her daughter in bed, clutching onto a dead baby.

It was a very difficult job to deal with. For many reasons. We had to get the police out. We had to try and pursuade a maternity hospital to accept both the mother and the dead baby. We had to deal with the hysterical Grandmother, the distraught Mother, the upset sisters of the Mother (one of whom was also hugely pregnant) and the dead baby.

Following this job I took my next shift off. My crew mate is still off. I was prayed for at church and felt a supernatural peace fall on me. That is the only way I can describe it. From that point on I have been able to think about it without bursting into tears.

I returned to work, and as my crewmate was still off I was sent to another station to crew up with some one else. However, on my way there, I was responded to a "driver only" job. (responded to an incident to provide treatment until a crew can arrive and transport the patient to hospital). In fact, not just one "driver only" job, but 4! And the crews were so busy that I was waiting a long time for an ambulance to arrive each time. I waited 40 minutes with an elderly lady having a severe asthma attack. I waited 45 minutes with a 45 year old lady having a suspected heart attack. I hate waiting so long on my own with such critically ill patients. There is only so much you can do with the limited amount of equipment that we carry and it makes me feel helpless. But I did the best I could, and both patients had improved by the time an ambulance arrived. (We often find that just our presence helps people to feel safer, and so more relaxed, less tense and less poorly).

Then on Sunday I was working with a trainee. I usually seem to be working with a trainee when I get the slightly more awkward jobs that require a bit more thought, and I wish I was was with somebody with a bit more experienced! The first job we got was to a middle aged female who was caring for her terminally ill husband and had damaged her back. Not in itself complicated. However, she was the only carer for her husband, who needed full care (i.e. needed washing, feeding, medicating, toileting etc.) She needed to come to hospital with us. He did not want to come to hospital with us, but could not be left on his own. What to do? After calling about 15 different numbers and being passed from pillar to post I eventually managed to get hold of an on call district nurse who promised to be over to visit him within the hour and assess his needs, putting emergency care into place. Hopefully she was true to her word because we then left to take the wife into hospital.

Later that same day we went to a mental health patient who was having a mental health crisis (usually well controlled by medication, but suddenly gone somehow awry). He was hallucinating, suicidal, paranoid, agitated and generally not himself. As he had been "well" for so long, he no longer had a psychiatrist or mental health nurse. His own GP was on holiday and he abhorred accident and emergency departments and did not want to be taken to one (which is our only option usually). It has to be said that an accident and emergency department is NOT and ideal place for someone experiencing a mental health crisis. With this in mind I contacted the mental health unit where he had been before. They had no beds, and even if they had, would not take a "referral" from me, it would have to be a GP. I tried a medical admissions ward (not much better than A and E but a bit more private and settled, with more chance of being taken seriously). To no avail. They didn't want anything to do with him. (They did have beds). I then managed to get a phone number for a mental health crisis team. They said they couldn't come out on a Sunday. I was shocked. But having tried all other avenues he did come with us to A and E. I hope they took him seriously and treated him well. I hope the mental health unit managed to make space for him with a "referral" from an A and E doctor.

In both situations we coped. But I do wonder what (if any) other avenues might have occurred to someone who's been doing the job for many years.

Rubbish!

Ok, so I must admit I've been totally rubbish at updating this blog. As my brother has pointed out in his comment. It's due to a number of reasons, mainly that I've been trying to spend some time with my boyfriend, and also been seeing as much of my new neice as possible. She has actually now reached her due date (16th Aug) and weighed in at a whopping 9lb 14oz this morning! I'm sure Kati's pleased she was early as she would have been one huge baby to give birth to had she been full term!

Work has also been extremelly busy, as everyone seems to be off sick, or pregnant or stressed. As we seem unable to get any annual leave granted the morale is low, stress levels high, and sickness through the roof. For the past two weeks in my sector (a group of 3 stations) only 2 of us out of 9 on my shifts have actually been in. I realised the other day that the last annual leave I got granted was in January. I applied for 8 different weeks this year, of which I got two shifts granted! However, I have finally managed to get onto a day rota!!!! This will be from the start of September, for a temporary period of three months, which is not ideal, but better than nothing.

And, talking about holidays, the 2 shifts which I got granted are night shifts over the bank holiday weekend (the last ones I expected to get). I am planning a weekend in Swanage with Simon, my best friend and her boyfriend. It should be a good weekend and I'm really looking forward to it.

Unfortunately, I have not been busy with climbing, although I wish I could find time to. Also, my study has been much quieter since my exam a month ago, because I now only have one module on the go. But my time still seems to have been very short.

Simon and I took my older niece and nephew to see the ambulances at work last weekend. They were thrilled. I even gave them a ride around the car park with the lights and sirens on. After that we spent the rest of the day at Noah's ark zoo farm, which they enjoyed but think they found a bit of an anti climax after a ride in a ambulance!

Short Update

This is my news in brief!

Yesterday I had my OU Human Biology exam, which seemed to go quite well, despite the exam room being sweltering and the pen sliding out of my sweaty hand constantly!

Work is going well, but there's no news yet on the day rota that I'm waiting for, and have been expecting to hear about.

My new niece is now home from hospital and doing well, but wanting feeding hourly, so exhausting my sister.

I am going to visit my older brother on Thursday with my Mum. We're staying til Sunday. It should be a pleasant few days away although I suspect that my brother will get us doing his decorating/gardening/DIY etc. to keep us out of trouble. I also hope to get some climbing in while I'm there and I'm looking forward to spending a bit more time with his girlfriend, who I've met once and seemed lovely.

I have had several interesting jobs recently, which I hope to get round to writing about soon.

My car (a 14 year old citroen AX) passed her MOT a couple of weeks ago. First time. Needing no work. That's the third time in a row! What a faithful car she is. I rewarded her with a new cam belt.

That's all I've got time for at the moment, I'll try and write a fuller posting soon.